Well, not really. Our 11-3 loss to the Catahoula Orcs wasn’t that bad, but it did provide an excuse for the headline and for the photo of our own Lizzy Gabor, who underwent an Uglyectomy less than an hour after the game. She was playing soccer at the time, which is totally unrelated to our Center City Softball League, but, hey, it was the best art I had.
(Liz promises, by the way, that she will not miss any of our games because of the facial repositioning. Or, at least, she won’t be any later than usual or forget any additional equipment.)
On to the game!
Catahoula, for those unveterans among you, used to be the playing portion of the Franklin Institute roster. In the most recent offseason, the non-playing portion of the Franklin roster demanded that, in the future, they, well, you know, play occasionally. Since the non-playing portion was also the only portion that had any connection to the Franklin Institute, they won – and haven’t won since.
That’s the way the Catalites tell it, anyway. The truth is that Franklin, after five straight championships, lost in the World Series to the Tap Room last year. And because of that, the whole world had to blow up! And so it did, which led to an unsafe cooling of the earth’s core and the fucking divisional setup in the CCSL, which blows. Somehow, we added two more teams and play fewer games. Go figure that one.
Anyway, the Catahummus still can’t beat the Tap Room, which would be a lot funnier if Little Al & The Imperials were the least bit likeable. Such is not the case. Also anyway, we still can’t beat the Real Franklin/Catamongas, or at least we couldn’t on Monday at lovely Edgeley 8.
It was an interesting enough game. They scored three in the top of the first and then hung around to see if they needed to score more. It was still a 4-1 game in the top of the fifth when the Orcs added three more and, after we scored two in the sixth, four more for good measure in the top of the seventh. The top three batters in their lineup – Matty, Nick and Ryan – scored eight of their 11 runs, which is pretty predictable. It was a surgical win, for the most part.
True highlight was Russ Krause nailing a runner at the plate with a great throw, and also a great tag by Chris Yasiejko. In the field, we did fine, and a hardy welcome back to Brian Donlen, who was also welcomed back by Edgeley 8, which tried repeatedly to put a ball in his throat.
Offensively, we just didn’t hit at all. Score three and you lose, no matter who you play. Nevins had three of our 10 hits. No one else had more than one. We brought just 32 batters to the plate in a seven-inning slow-pitch softball game, which is hard to do.
It could have been a little better. We left the bases loaded in the third, but put just six runners in scoring position all day and got three of them home. Oh, well. Wasn’t our night. Wasn’t Lizzy’s, either, apparently.
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